It’s true, I do. This morning I came up with the perfect topic for this blog post while listening to “Don’t let me down” by the Chainsmokers feat. Daya, and I was like, “Daya, you absolute gem! Thank you for inspiring me with that bridge you just owned, I know exactly what I’m going to write about now.”
One of the biggest internal struggles I have faced since beginning to share my thoughts and wisdom with the world is due to having somewhat of a black and white mindset. I have felt at points like maybe I am supposed to give up some of my old ways. Can I be a deep, reflective writer and still be the life of the party? Can I still be the silly one who is forgetful and makes all of her friends laugh and wonder why my hair isn’t lighter? 😉
Do I have to give up living the way I do, to become who I am becoming?
I’ve gone back and forth with this in my head; it has caused me anxiety because the idea of changing anything about they way I am now makes me feel sad. So why would I inflict this struggle upon myself?
Understanding that we always have a choice in how we feel is difficult to grasp, but once we do, it is incredibly freeing.
Even though I write deep things, it doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy the world on a day-to-day level. I am a soul searcher and a dreamer, but I also enjoy the simple things in life; wine and really cheesy pizza, craft beer with my main squeeze, crude jokes, and ridiculous YouTube videos. I shop at Aritzia and I love top 40 pop music…especially Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber. Selena is pretty cool too.
One of the most beautiful things about deciding to live an authentic life is that you can choose what you fill it with. It’s never just black and white.
So who says I can’t live in this world and enjoy everything it has to offer, and still be deep and wise in my writing, too? The only person who tells me such a thing is me. So I am going to allow myself to have both.
I am choosing to embrace the newly expressed parts of me, without throwing out the old.
Thanks for reading again this week ~
XOXO, Love Chelsie